Drunk Facebook pictures will screw you with employers

Local news just loves certain topics. The dangers of social networking sites is one of them. Drunk kids is the other. So this story on NBC11 about college kids posting photos of themselves hammered and passed out in various locales seems like a natural fit.

boojoy says

"I saw your Web site. What do you mean you don't want to have sex with me? Your Web site says you do."

This is a great pick up line.

smartcause asks

What kind of person looks at that group and thinks "hey, I've got a picture of me drunk and passed out with a cat walking on my head, I should totally upload it!"

CTRaiderThe1st says

#14 Perfect for a resume if getting into porn.

milkman4350 says

Enjoy college ladies. Enjoy college.

Kanye West, 50 Cent face off again on album sales

Kanye West and 50 Cent will have another head-to-head. Not in the cool, 8-Mile rap battle style, no it's just a competition for who can make the most money. Kind of like a challenge among Best Buy employees about who can make the most commission in a given month.

Kanye West, who despite his poor grammar and unrivaled douchebaggery, won last year's money-off with Fitty, but to be fear, West actually writes some pretty decent songs, when compared to 50 Cent, who simply spits line-after-line of cliché with a vocal composite that sounds like he has a few too many balls in his mouth.

ohnoerino says

Clash of the egomaniacs 2008!

dnw5032 says

I smell a sitcom

bassman12593 says

Music is like candy, you throw out all the rappers.

New dad Clay Aiken is gay

After somehow making some type of mutant baby with record producer Jaymes Foster, American Idol loser Clay Aiken comes out of the closet. What a shocker. CNN reports that the announcement was suspected by many. Not really sure what tipped them off: maybe it was his blatant homosexuality or the fact that he sang a Gloria Estefan song co-written by Mac Gayden. Really, gay-den. I shit you not.

piznut asks

Which closet would that be? The one with the glass door on it?

thetanman says

You know how I know you're gay? You're Clay Aiken.

jerrolds says

more like Gay Aiken AMIRITE?

sapphire9488 asks

seriously, is there anyone who didn't figure this out 5 years ago?

bobjewback says

in other news ruben studdard is fat

House is probably a health risk

Some people just aren't fit to live on their own. Nothing evidences the point better than this Houston home. Trash lines nearly every inch of the floor, as pizza boxes and fast food wrappers become a sort of makeshift carpet. And once you see the pictures of the bathroom, you might struggle to maintain control of your stomach and bowel reflexes. It's that bad.

delkarnu asks

the real question is, "how many lvl 70 characters does she have?"

johnfn says

How CAN anyone live like that? Who would even think of owning an emachines computer?

lex99 says

The ironing board is a nice touch.

stomicron replies

Irony

Spacecow asks

What is that shit on the bathroom floors? Insulation?

pavel_lishin replies

Shit.

Wisconsin's finest

Aves Taxidermy and Cheese? Sounds like a match made in heaven.

lektroluv asks

What's so funny about this? They need the cheese to catch the animals they stuff.

xyllar replies

or maybe they stuff the animals with cheese.

filolife says

Wisconsinite here saying this does not surprise me at all.

Man killed by condom

Man stretches condom over his head. Man suffocates. What a way to go.

Pete0430 says

Natural selection at its finest!

DroogInPhoenix says

Safe sex kills.

jcharak58 says

covered the wrong head

Guitar Hero optical illusion

Rumor is if you stare at it long enough, you can see she's playing Guitar Hero. It's not working for me, but then again, I was never very good at decoding those 3D Magic Eye paintings.

Melodik says

She's spilling out of her top. That's not attractive, just an indication she needs better-fitting clothing.

bustachops replies

false - it's attractive. my wiener does not lie

skinflute replies

It's an indication that they want out.

aforce369 says

I'd let her use my whammy-bar.

Mistle says

I don't know if anyone has noticed, but if you look away from the guitar you can see she has pretty big breasts.

lipglossnerd asks

Which is more plastic? The guitar or her boobs?

saeglopur says

It's a sailboat.

Oprah vs. over 9,000 penises

Oprah falls victim to not one, but two Internet memes. Over nine-thousand and pedobear for the win.

ligyron says

THAT'S OVER 18000 BALLS

GassyTurd says

Epic troll. That deserves an award. They must have laughed themselves unconscious when they saw that on TV.

ursername180 says

Next week on Oprah: Oprah learns about the internet.

Beckwith says

Internet: 1
Oprah: 0

slapded says

oprah eats 9000 calories a day

Worst fighting technique

This UFC fighter's technique looks pretty good to me. His opponent seems pretty scared too.

hantata says

It appears to be working... why the hell is the other guy backing away!? Go in and rip his arm off..

JoeJoeMa says

works like a charm on my 10 year old sister

Wootstapler says

I'm going to be swinging my arms through the air while blocking, and if you just so happened to get hit, that's not my fault

Google News fail

This slip-up, showing Gov. Sarah Palin pictured next to a story about pig cruelty, is pretty great taken out of context. But it's not a total stretch. Remember that controversy about lipstick on a pig? The Google machines are trying, guys.

mentat says

You sir, mispelled "win"

cloudform says

For once, I don't feel hungry for bacon.

cantitoe says

You bookmarked TV Guide...What a loser!!!

How iTunes Genius really works

In the new 8.0 version of iTunes, Apple introduced a feature called Genius. The Genius button aggregates a playlist of songs from your library that are similar to your song of choice, much like Pandora. So how does this fine technology work, you ask?

Denneval says

Genius playlist generated from "Governor Sarah Palin's Speech from RNC Podcast":

1. Fred Rogers — "Won't You Be My Neighbor"
2. Aqua — "Barbie Girl"
3. Dragon Tales — Max, Emmy, Enrique, Cassie, Ord, Zak and Wheezie — "Dragon Tune"
4. Paris Hilton — "Stars Are Blind"
5. Gene Wood — "Captain Kangaroo Overture"
6. Sounds of Sesame Street — Ernie — "Rubber Duckie"

It seems to be pretty accurate.

kawaiirobo says

I thought Genius was going to be cool, but I keep getting recommended Adema, WTF apple, WTF.

archivist replies

least it's not John Mayer

Court says police illegally taped nursing home sex

A Wisconsin man was videotaped having sex with his comatose wife, and a district court says: that's just wrong. No, not the guy boning an unconscious woman; the fact that he was videotaped doing it. And I've got to agree. Why would you ever want to rewatch that? Ew, ew, ew.

4LeggedtriPod says

"She believes her sister's husband was merely expressing his love for his wife and was trying everything he could to bring her back to consciousness"

If that were the case my pillow would have become conscious years ago.

je12u replies

His Pillow:
http://img.thefind.com/images/XQAlxsENgDAIAEB

control98408 says

Don't know if want.

Church sign champion: Our Lady of Martyrs

The clever exchange between confrontational Church sign-changers, although fake, is a pretty fun read. Beulah Cumberland Presbyterian Church put up a good fight, but Our Lady of Martyrs Catholic ultimately puts up the spiciest brand of mustard.

NuclearIsShit says

That sign is right, doggy style IS heaven!

binky79 has a good point

If animals don't go to heaven what will we eat up there?

archivist replies

Bacon, my dear friend...lots and lots of Bacon.

icehazard asks

what if there is no bacon :(

FDDIcent responds

Then it wouldn't be heaven for me

Reporter fail

Sucks for that guy.

Wayner says

dude, look out for that POLE!

State Your Name says

In Soviet Poland, Poles look out for YOU!!

AustinSlacker says

So.. pretty sure the camera operator and boom man saw the pole coming and decided the reporter fucker deserved to get his face smashed?

Camera guy win!

Cookie monster spotted

The fact that Digg listed this image as "BREAKING" makes it that much funnier. Kudos.

LilJimmyNordin says

C is for Chronic Obesity, iss good enough for me

Tankturner says

MAN THE HARPOONS!

alecadvent says

Dayyummmm girl.
Are your legs tired?


'Cus you're really fat

Sil369 ushers in the meme

*waits of the the cookie to be photoshopped into other things*

SuperWinner replies

http://img231.imageshack.us/my.php?image=ichatimag ...

robgford replies

http://img183.imageshack.us/my.php?image=cookie2wa ...

rhustang replies

http://i38.tinypic.com/4tpyeg.jpg

MeatyMcBeef replies

http://img229.imageshack.us/my.php?image=omnomfo6. ...

Tea a healthier drink than water

A group of researchers published a study saying three to four cups of tea per day can cut the chances of having a heart attack, contract cancer, have tooth plaque and tooth decay. Plus, it's got a decent amount of caffeine, which certainly gets me through the day! Yay for hot tea.

Brian47126 says

"The Tea Council provided funding for the work. Dr Ruxton stressed that the work was independent"

That's the part I am having trouble with. Kinda like, Exon funding a study about healthy uses for crude oil.

Gamer2k4 says

Tea's healthier than water? Imagine that! If you add ANYTHING that's healthy to water, you come up with a drink that's healthier than water. So why is this news?

DteK says

bacon > tea && water

miggie says

I find drinking tea when my period is on keeps me from cramping.

getrealnow replies

Want to get married?

SLockhart replies

oooh gross, don't talk about your period!

Why you don't friend your mom on Facebook

I don't know how connecting with your mom on the Internet would at any point sound like a good idea.

solidus636 asks

Isn't Klinefelter a disease?? Something about having smaller testicles?............

baldgye says

I see your mum likes talking dirty, that skank

Weirdcore says

"Sue Anne Klinefelte Is now you friend", Hope you don't mind?

jbbears554 replies

Its more like: "Why you don't post your mom's facebook on Digg"

riskybeats says

I wish my mom would accept my friend add : (

Lith25 replies

She added mine

Dolphins evolve opposable thumbs

You've got to love the Onion. The dolphins have become the people of the ocean, and we must make our time. A quote from the fake story: "I believe I speak for the entire human race when I say, 'Holy fuck,'" said Dr. James Aoki. "That's it for us monkeys."

bicyclethief says

They like eating fish and squid. That is a weakness I believe we can exploit.

forthex says

What the FUCK! NO WAY!

*theonion.com*

God damn it!

obliviousfool says

Dolphins ...the only thing they can't do is play football.

MySpace launches digital music store

Called MySpace Music, the service will launch this month, and will allow users of the social network site to listen to any song from the catalogs of three major labels. MySpace is still the giant in the music realm, even if nobody uses it for social anything anymore. This should be interesting.

myhandleondigg is pretty harsh

Who gives a shit, if its going to be on those crappy Myspace players? I'd rather get shot in the face.

godinster seems to have the consensus

it's still myspace and it still sucks

grodrigu says

When I go to my friend's house the same song doesn't blare at me every time I open the door.

Schoolgirl's perfume sends 11 students, bus driver to hospital

A Manchester, N.H. middle school student accidentally dropped a bottle of perfume on the bus. The bottle exploded, and was deemed stinky. So repugnant, in fact, that 11 students and the guy driving the bus had to be committed to the hospital, after complaints of nausea and dizziness.

ieyeaye says

It's called Sex Panther by Odeon.

Dumbledorito says

Isn't that how much they use, anyway? I figure things like "Axe" must have "Contents: One Application" on the cans somewhere, given the visible aura of stench its users seem to have.

Sornos replies

They should have also print:
"WARNING: Use of this product may cause your douche levels to rise"

Tumples says

That was a short story.

hotpuck6 replies

"the girl probably will be disciplined."

Wow, that's just good reporting right there.

What we know about the Playstation 4

So, what do we know about the next version of the Playstation? The general consensus is: very little.

Kbriggs says

Realistically this is a 2013-2014 release date for a PS4....so why are people submitting articles 3-5 years in advance?

loganhid says

The PS4 will be a one solution device in that you will be able to play games on it, watch movies, browse the net, download, drive it, possible live in it, cook on it, bath in it, use it as a weapon and probably if we're lucky run Crysis.

lnohavenhalos replies

And the xbox720 will feature FOUR red rings of death. Wow, this is exciting! :P

Titans QB Vince Young was suicidal

File this one under: things that really shouldn't be talked about. But since just about every sports fan in the country has heard about this already — after ESPN publicized the shit out of it — Tennessee Titans quarterback Vince Young, during his injury, was discovered to be driving around with a gun. Was he preparing to kill the Jaguars for injuring him? No, he is apparently suicidal.

jroussell says

so i shouldn't start him this week on my fantasy team then?

SimmaDownNow replies

The curse of the Madden cover.

dafragsta replies

Does the curse extend beyond one version of Madden.

HamSandwich replies

I don't know, ask Michael Vick...

You should never ask for help on the Internet

I think this is pretty good advice.

Kanye West arrested at LAX airport

Rapper Kanye West was arrested on September 11 for being a terrori — whoa, whoa, I mean, breaking some dude's camera. I'd imagine the photographer who had his camera destroyed would seek damages, but I ain't sayin' he's a gold digger.

steger says

I hope they charge him with asshattery.

AStack75 says

George Bush doesn't care about black people.

lostsymphonies1 says

TSA doesn't care about black people.

baldbomber says

Kanye West doesn't care about cameras, people.

mk3k says

I don't care about Kanye West.

Just take the blocks

This is one angry Craigslist seller. I guess cement blocks can get on anyone's nerves.

jsdratm says

when you see it... you'll shit cinder blocks

CoreyTamas says

I have a plan to use some cinder blocks to build a little something. I'm going to contact this guy right away. I bet he could help me.

twishart asks

Are the blocks still available?

wedges replies

better question, i'm trying to build a shed to keep my lawncare stuff in, and i was thinking instead of buying one or using wood panels i could make one out of these blocks. are these strong enough to use for construction? if so do you know the best way to do this, or can you help me do it this weekend?

OneLess says

FUCK IT, WE'LL GET THE BLOCKS LIVE!

legoalert33 replies

FUCKING BLOCKS SUCK!

Found him

Apparently Waldo was hiding at 158 23rd St. in New York. Sneaky bastard.

teckjunkie says

He thought he would be clever by removing his hat.

EatChex89 says

The book was hard enough, you found him in the world.

braininabox says

Its weird not seeing him surrounded by 1,000 vikings or medieval peasants and their farm animals.

cyclopssmiley says

I think google street view was created for the internet's entertainment more then an actual tool.

conceptsti says

That is what google maps was made to do
Find waldo

jwatts07 is not satisfied

Now, we just need to find Carmen San Diego

Dickhead

Classy. Real classy.

smashingmonkey says

Looks like the water is pretty cold.

adrenalmedulla9 says

Him leaving his mother's womb must have been quite a bizarre sight.

badwithcomputer links

http://i33.tinypic.com/1zeavfc.gif

mrcoldcow says

It's funny because the back of his head looks like a penis.

Clintowned

Something tells me Hillary Clinton isn't over the whole Monica Lewinski thing...

badjoke says

DENIED.

Lacero says

HILARYOUS!

morninglorii can explain the phenomenon

Once you go black...

pbdyhcky189 replies

...your parents stop talking to you.

wrzhydr replies

your vagina never tightens back?

Tomholious replies

2 of my friends died going black

TheWriteGuy replies

It's "Once you go BARACK..."

cgibbo says

I thought the joke was that she's putting a 'kick me' sign on his back (watch it again, shit brix).

One of a kind recording

Yes, yes, I know: older than Estelle Getty. But if a well known music blog can write about it, why can't I? The clip originally aired on a TechTV program. (Thanks to Califaudio for the tip.)

Chris seems to be a trustworthy source on this one

Its not one of a kind.. I have seen many of these in flea markets.

localhost says

ah well no great loss, i’m sure someone would have ripped an mp3 copy if it was that historical.

Radio_Talk_Show says

I remember this guy from college. He used to break things on purpose, just so he could say “SHIT”.

Man faces 21 years for killing baby who interrupted video game

Some sicko murders an 18-day-old baby who wouldn't shut up when he was trying to play a video game. It's a sick story, but he gets his comeuppance. Let's turn to the comments for a lighter side.

Elliottx asks

The bigger question is. What game was he playing?

spkrcity replies

According to this article
it was an "assault type" game.

penguinofhonor replies

Obviously that means that the game was training him to kill babies.

zbeast says

Babyality!

smashingmonkey says

Talk about fragging newbs...

(Sorry, I use humor as a defense mechanism when faced with something unthinkable. In this case I know I should be dugg down)

ModeSeven replies

I'd digg you up but then we'd both go to hell.

Hannah Montanah Gummy Guitars

Disney seems to be selling these gummy, er, guitars as a promotion for "Hannah Montanah" star Miley Cyrus' tour. This could be a problem.

SpiderBoar is beginning to see a problem here

wait a second...

synstar has made a grave mistake

You just know some photoshopper will replace that mic she's holding with a ... well, you know.

raisedinhell replies 2 hours later

http://img357.imageshack.us/im...

doublefelix says

They are fretted for her pleasure.

Mountain bike speed world record

Well done, sir.

jgq85 asks

What the hell else did he think was going to happen?

agent7788 wonders

Guess he's not going back to the future?

xxxlxt says

Well then, I now know not to ride my mountain bike down a volcano.
Mountain bike are for mountains, volcano bikes are for volcanos.

osc1882 asks the question on everyone's mind

So.... is he dead?

Richard Dawkins reads his email

Okay, so there was this pretty interesting YouTube video showing famed atheist Richard Dawkins eating the souls of babies. Or I'm pretty sure it was him reading critical emails from angry Christians. If it was the former, I can totally understand why it had to be removed from YouTube, but the latter? We may never know for sure.

You don't really need to see the video to appreciate the comments anyway.

breddy quotes

I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ.

--Mohandas Gandhi

13ren asks Gandhi

And what do you think of Western civilization?

2424 replies

I think it would be a good idea!

-- Gandhi

tyywebb says

I'd fight Gandhi.

loonytoad replies

How many five-year-olds could Ghandi take in a fight?

BLACKINFIDEL then turns it into a callout thread

I'd fight Abe Lincoln

unbibium replies

Shatner.