How to not lose a fight with your girlfriend

Certainly valuable advice — though probably not to many of the guys on Digg — is this tutorial for always winning fights with your girlfriend. Tips include listening, calming her crying, and saying things like, "Look into my eyes." It should come as no surprise that this seemingly useless how-to was written by a woman. Real tips live in the comments.

chrysrobyn says

You lose all arguments with your wife. If you think you won, either the food will be bad, or the sex will be bad.

ericjohnson0 says

First, in order for there to be a fight, there had to be some failure to communicate... And I'm here to help...

The Dictionary of 'Wifespeak' (or girlfriend in this case).

Examples:

She says- "We need"
That means- "I want"

She says "It's your decision"
That means "The correct decision should be obvious by now"

She says "Do what you want"
That Means "You'll pay for this later"

chuckDontSurf adds to the list

"Whatever" = "Fuck you"
Also, "I'm fine" means "You fucked up big time"

fxu1989 replies

WOMEN, YOU ARE DIFFICULT... I DON'T KNOW MOONSPEAK

Henman is going to make some lucky girl really happy one day

Just punch her in the face. Fight won.
Then blow a load in her eyes just for good measure.